a star-scattered field, / the city fades under a / blood orange sunrise
Haiku | “a star-scattered field the city”
March 4, 2016 by Peter Galen Massey
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Massey Grade: C+
Massey Comment: I like the words in this, but the syntax is scrambled to fit the form and it scrambles the sense as well, this haiku is nothing but description, and overall I feel like the Muse gave me a pitch to hit here and I just fouled the damn thing off instead of driving it into the right center gap and cruising into second with a stand up double.