Haiku | “the poem alights a bird” | Peter Galen Massey

Haiku | “the poem alights a bird”

July 1, 2020 by Peter Galen Massey

you wait in patience / stillness. the poem alights / a bird on your hand

Posted in Haiku | Tagged haiku, modern haiku, Poems | 6 Comments

6 Responses

on June 18, 2017 at 4:47 pm | Reply Maureen Sudlow

I wish
- on June 18, 2017 at 6:07 pm | Reply Peter Galen Massey
  
  Mine don’t come any other way, so I don’t have much choice in the matter
on June 19, 2017 at 6:59 am | Reply johnmcellhenney

RST would like this. So do I! Love Pop

Sent from my iPhone

>
- on June 19, 2017 at 3:29 pm | Reply Peter Galen Massey
  
  Thanks. I’m not quite happy with the “poems” (plural) but the “bird” (singular). Seems like they should match. I fiddled the second line to keep the “like” and not run out of syllables … but I’m wondering if “you wait in patience / stillness. the poem alights / a bird on your hand” wouldn’t be better, the like implied and the line break doing most of the job for me. And the word “like” has a harsh metallic sound, nice to get rid of that beastie. Yes, I think I like the revision better.
on January 9, 2018 at 1:37 pm | Reply onalongsabbatical

This is beautiful. The incredible directness of the poem and the bird as one entity/experience.
- on January 9, 2018 at 2:46 pm | Reply Peter Galen Massey
  
  Thanks! P.

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